Life at № 42 by E.M. Coutinho
By now you’ve probably seen President Shyster posing next to a table covered in files:
The setup was extraordinary. Basically he said, Dear Public, these are papers. Papers mean I have no conflicts of interest. No, you can’t see the papers. Plus, there’s no such thing as conflicts of interest for a president anyway! So my props are actually pointless. So stupid! It’s all the fault of that place with the slanty eyed people, the one that rhymes with vagina.
Just in case that wasn’t enough, he carted out his lawyer- because we obviously know there’s never been a lawyer willing to mislead people (in all history.) She began by comparing President Shyster to Nelson Rockefeller. Had I been drinking something I would have spit it out. Meanwhile his Shysterettes were a few steps away from him because nothing proves you won’t be mixing family, business interests and the office of president like having all your children on the stage of one of your first press conferences as president elect.